I give up. People are too complicated. I will NEVER understand anyone. I will NEVER get on with anyone. They're too complicated. They're too... unexplainable. I can say something about someone and the moment I say it I am wrong because that person is more than whatever I just said. I can think someone as someone and the moment I do that I'm wrong because that person is more than the person whom I just 'thought'.
Basically I can never think about anyone because doing that is just fantasizing. Whatever I say that links to "people" or "society" or "so-and-so" is bull!$#! because I know I'm wrong, I know all of that just exists inside my head far from reality. Go out in the real world and I just realise I've been playing a show inside my head, none of it exists, no person is ever like the "person" I pictured in my head. They're just too complicated, too unpredictable, too irreducible.
I don't know. Humans are too... "precious" for me to deal with. I don't want to screw anyone's life by getting involved with them. Their life is too precious. It's too hard for me to do anything with them. I just... find myself staying away...
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Thursday, May 14, 2009
The Importance of Doing What You Love
I thought it was overrated.
I honestly thought you could come to love to do anything.
I was wrong.
We are born as different individuals. With different talents, different strengths.
What you must do is follow your stars. Follow your destiny. Follow what your heart desires.
Don't deny what you love. What you love is what you love! Don't try to fool yourself - you can't. You cannot fool your heart. You cannot change who you are.
People think a miserable life is a life out in the streets or something. Being poor. Having no social recognition. Being alone.
No, no, no! Oh what delusion all that is! My answer to all the above: who cares.
A miserable life is a life where you are NOT following what your heart desires.
You could be out in the gutters. You could be out of pocket. But that doesn't matter. You will still be living a worthy, happy, satisfactory life if you are following what your heart desires.
When you are following what your heart desires -
You can endure anything. Nothing can stand in your way.
When you are NOT following what your heart desires -
Even the smallest things will stress you. The most trivial of things will bring you down. You'll be left lost. You'll be left wondering "What on Earth am I doing here? What am I doing with my life?"
Follow your heart's desire. Follow what you love. At all costs.
Heaven helps those that help themselves.
Doors will open when you chase them passionately enough.
NO dream is too lofty. NO goal is impossible.
The question isn't whether things are possible or not. The question is whether you have the guts, the drive, the passion to make these things possible. Whether you are willing to give everything to follow what your heart truly desires.
What miserable life you lead when you are not doing what you want. When you are constantly questioning, doubting yourself. You wonder what on earth you are doing here. You feel like an illegit baby. You feel you are wasting your life...
Do what you love. Follow what your heart desires. Don't listen to other people. They don't feel the same happiness you do when you follow what you want to do. They can't dictate your life - of course they can't... They DON'T KNOW WHO YOU ARE. The person who best knows oneself is... oneself. The person that can make the best decisions for oneself is... oneself. NO ONE in this world can dictate what your heart desires except... yourself.
Everyone is different. Everyone has different values, motivations. That is why "advice" on what you should do with your life, ultimately FAILS. Because, by very nature, any "recommendations" are... flawed. The only "good" advice I believe someone can give someone else regarding such matter is telling to really spend quality time going over their mind - really getting to know what their heart truly desires - and following it.
When you are following what your heart desires - you can endure anything.
When you are not following what your heart desires - you can endure nothing.
I honestly thought you could come to love to do anything.
I was wrong.
We are born as different individuals. With different talents, different strengths.
What you must do is follow your stars. Follow your destiny. Follow what your heart desires.
Don't deny what you love. What you love is what you love! Don't try to fool yourself - you can't. You cannot fool your heart. You cannot change who you are.
People think a miserable life is a life out in the streets or something. Being poor. Having no social recognition. Being alone.
No, no, no! Oh what delusion all that is! My answer to all the above: who cares.
A miserable life is a life where you are NOT following what your heart desires.
You could be out in the gutters. You could be out of pocket. But that doesn't matter. You will still be living a worthy, happy, satisfactory life if you are following what your heart desires.
When you are following what your heart desires -
You can endure anything. Nothing can stand in your way.
When you are NOT following what your heart desires -
Even the smallest things will stress you. The most trivial of things will bring you down. You'll be left lost. You'll be left wondering "What on Earth am I doing here? What am I doing with my life?"
Follow your heart's desire. Follow what you love. At all costs.
Heaven helps those that help themselves.
Doors will open when you chase them passionately enough.
NO dream is too lofty. NO goal is impossible.
The question isn't whether things are possible or not. The question is whether you have the guts, the drive, the passion to make these things possible. Whether you are willing to give everything to follow what your heart truly desires.
What miserable life you lead when you are not doing what you want. When you are constantly questioning, doubting yourself. You wonder what on earth you are doing here. You feel like an illegit baby. You feel you are wasting your life...
Do what you love. Follow what your heart desires. Don't listen to other people. They don't feel the same happiness you do when you follow what you want to do. They can't dictate your life - of course they can't... They DON'T KNOW WHO YOU ARE. The person who best knows oneself is... oneself. The person that can make the best decisions for oneself is... oneself. NO ONE in this world can dictate what your heart desires except... yourself.
Everyone is different. Everyone has different values, motivations. That is why "advice" on what you should do with your life, ultimately FAILS. Because, by very nature, any "recommendations" are... flawed. The only "good" advice I believe someone can give someone else regarding such matter is telling to really spend quality time going over their mind - really getting to know what their heart truly desires - and following it.
When you are following what your heart desires - you can endure anything.
When you are not following what your heart desires - you can endure nothing.
Saturday, April 18, 2009
Two very different ways of communicating.
I cannot speak.
I cannot talk.
I cannot communicate.
*
I wish to make two very important distinctions in the art of communication -
social communication, and
purely functional communication.
The irony is, that much of the time, both use the same vehicle called language. But, the latter is, by far, the simpler one. The latter, is something a machine can do. The latter, is something that can be "learned" quite easily.
What I am referring to is 'pure' information exchange. This is simple. In fact, one need only but the simplest means to achieve this. Also it's 'universal', in the sense that anyone can 'learn' to do it, and also, the identity of the sender and receiver doesn't matter. They're just passing on information. One cannot care less about who it is that is the messenger.
Social communication.
This is a completely different beast, though it is an emergent form of communication that arises "from" functional communication. However, it is much more complex. A mistake one can oh-so-easily make is to equate this unique form of communication with that of pure "information-exchange".
Oh how wrong that is! Oh how misleading! Oh how... unforgivingly irreconcilable those two forms of communication are!
To prove my point: disastrous consequences arise if one interprets social communication as purely functional communication.
And let me tell you this - the skills used in the above two forms of communications are completely, utterly, different. I may even go as far as to say that our brain process these two forms in different ways.
Let me illustrate what I mean. I'm not trying to be pedantic in differentiating these two forms of communication. These are real differences that I feel everyday.
A scientist who writes a brilliant, Nobel-prize winning, succint, complex, paper ... may find it hard to exchange 'social niceties' with a cashier at the local supermarket.
A novelist, or a poet, may write one of the most resounding, heart-moving works of our lifetime ... but it may be impossible to have a 'casual conversation' over a cup of tea with them.
A brilliant orator may speak one of the most inspiring speeches ever; yet at a dinner party afterwards, they may not have a clue how to speak to other, actual, people.
Note in illustrating the above, I have shown just how wide the scope of "functional" (information-exchange) communication can be. It may even strongly touch people emotionally (as in the novelist / orator example) BUT, with all that said, it is still distinct from "social" communication.
I don't know.
I don't know how one becomes adept at that obscure art of social communication.
I guess it's some genetics. And socio-psycho-cultural upbringing and exposure.
But one thing resoundingly, heart-wrenchingly clear is that one can be ever-so-capable in one area, but can be completely deficient in another.
Oh the irony! Oh the misery ...
I cannot talk.
I cannot communicate.
*
I wish to make two very important distinctions in the art of communication -
social communication, and
purely functional communication.
The irony is, that much of the time, both use the same vehicle called language. But, the latter is, by far, the simpler one. The latter, is something a machine can do. The latter, is something that can be "learned" quite easily.
What I am referring to is 'pure' information exchange. This is simple. In fact, one need only but the simplest means to achieve this. Also it's 'universal', in the sense that anyone can 'learn' to do it, and also, the identity of the sender and receiver doesn't matter. They're just passing on information. One cannot care less about who it is that is the messenger.
Social communication.
This is a completely different beast, though it is an emergent form of communication that arises "from" functional communication. However, it is much more complex. A mistake one can oh-so-easily make is to equate this unique form of communication with that of pure "information-exchange".
Oh how wrong that is! Oh how misleading! Oh how... unforgivingly irreconcilable those two forms of communication are!
To prove my point: disastrous consequences arise if one interprets social communication as purely functional communication.
And let me tell you this - the skills used in the above two forms of communications are completely, utterly, different. I may even go as far as to say that our brain process these two forms in different ways.
Let me illustrate what I mean. I'm not trying to be pedantic in differentiating these two forms of communication. These are real differences that I feel everyday.
A scientist who writes a brilliant, Nobel-prize winning, succint, complex, paper ... may find it hard to exchange 'social niceties' with a cashier at the local supermarket.
A novelist, or a poet, may write one of the most resounding, heart-moving works of our lifetime ... but it may be impossible to have a 'casual conversation' over a cup of tea with them.
A brilliant orator may speak one of the most inspiring speeches ever; yet at a dinner party afterwards, they may not have a clue how to speak to other, actual, people.
Note in illustrating the above, I have shown just how wide the scope of "functional" (information-exchange) communication can be. It may even strongly touch people emotionally (as in the novelist / orator example) BUT, with all that said, it is still distinct from "social" communication.
I don't know.
I don't know how one becomes adept at that obscure art of social communication.
I guess it's some genetics. And socio-psycho-cultural upbringing and exposure.
But one thing resoundingly, heart-wrenchingly clear is that one can be ever-so-capable in one area, but can be completely deficient in another.
Oh the irony! Oh the misery ...
Friday, April 10, 2009
When everyone is right; when no road is commendable over any other...
Can someone tell me -
What do you do
When everyone is right;
When no road is commendable over any other road;
When no pursuit is any more valuable than any other;
When no way of life is 'better' than any other;
When no personality or character is more worthy than any other;
Can someone tell me
Of this myriad of equal and diverse ways;
What life I should lead...
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Misanthropes, friendships.
No man is in the deepest sense a misanthrope
Ironical as it seems, it is society that creates misanthropes
Those that are similar are bound to come together
They don’t even have to ‘try’ –
Things just fall together naturally like matching pieces
What great feeling it is to have someone else’s heart resonate with yours;
What a great sense of place you have in this world
When you have someone else to vindicate you too -
To reassure you that you are not alone;
That their heart beats, their mind moves, in a similar way to yours ...
If you have to 'try' -
Then you're with the wrong person :).
The thing about true friendships, and true love is that -
You can just be yourself -
You need not 'try', in any sense, at all -
And things will just unravel naturally
Magic will occur from the unmagical
You will marvel at how things just, simply, 'happen'...
Misanthropes don't really exist
There only exist people that can never understand them.
Misanthropes and loners can have friends too.
Someone just needs to show them that it is possible.
Someone just needs to show that it does not require perhaps as a big effort as they imagine it to be.
Someone just needs to show that they really are not alone, that there are others like them too...
Ironical as it seems, it is society that creates misanthropes
Those that are similar are bound to come together
They don’t even have to ‘try’ –
Things just fall together naturally like matching pieces
What great feeling it is to have someone else’s heart resonate with yours;
What a great sense of place you have in this world
When you have someone else to vindicate you too -
To reassure you that you are not alone;
That their heart beats, their mind moves, in a similar way to yours ...
If you have to 'try' -
Then you're with the wrong person :).
The thing about true friendships, and true love is that -
You can just be yourself -
You need not 'try', in any sense, at all -
And things will just unravel naturally
Magic will occur from the unmagical
You will marvel at how things just, simply, 'happen'...
Misanthropes don't really exist
There only exist people that can never understand them.
Misanthropes and loners can have friends too.
Someone just needs to show them that it is possible.
Someone just needs to show that it does not require perhaps as a big effort as they imagine it to be.
Someone just needs to show that they really are not alone, that there are others like them too...
Saturday, March 28, 2009
What it means to be alone.
Being alone is not about being physically isolated -
It is about being socio-culturally isolated.
One can be amidst a million people yet still be alone.
It is being utterly, irreconcilably different to all other people. Socially, culturally.
Of course, there are certain things, that as humans we share with other people - but in everyday life, these barest of 'lowest common denominators' don't really play much of a part.
This incomprehendable difference, rift and gulf between oneself and others produces and perpetuates the loner. One is irrevocably seperated and continues to drift further and further away from other people.
There are very few things normal people will 'have in common' with loners. They are socio-cultural aliens. Incomprehendable, irrecognisable. An enigma. Someone best to 'leave alone' - as you can see, the creation of a loner is a two-way process.
Mired in social anomie.
Cryptic. Incomprehensible. Irreconcilable
These words describe things in either directions - I view society like that; society views me like that.
It is about being socio-culturally isolated.
One can be amidst a million people yet still be alone.
It is being utterly, irreconcilably different to all other people. Socially, culturally.
Of course, there are certain things, that as humans we share with other people - but in everyday life, these barest of 'lowest common denominators' don't really play much of a part.
This incomprehendable difference, rift and gulf between oneself and others produces and perpetuates the loner. One is irrevocably seperated and continues to drift further and further away from other people.
There are very few things normal people will 'have in common' with loners. They are socio-cultural aliens. Incomprehendable, irrecognisable. An enigma. Someone best to 'leave alone' - as you can see, the creation of a loner is a two-way process.
Mired in social anomie.
Cryptic. Incomprehensible. Irreconcilable
These words describe things in either directions - I view society like that; society views me like that.
Why pitying is bad
Pitying is bad because when you pity someone, you implicitly place yourself above them. Sure, you might think that you’re providing ‘love’, ‘care’ and ‘concern’ to those being pitied –
But you make it pretty obvious to them that they didn’t really ‘earn’ your 'love / concern', that you are only doing it because you feel you are above them, and you feel that hence you possess the power/right/position to be the one who 'pities', whereas the other person lacks that power/right/position hence is the one who is 'pitied'.
You think that you’re the only one in control; that they only exist to receive your pity; that they're 'under' you, hence they 'deserve' your pity, by virtue of being in that perceived position...
Why did the phrase ‘as cold as charity’ arise when charity is supposed to be a 'good' thing?
Because, in my view, so often charity was (and sometimes still is) based on pity.
Pity is designed to seperate - to seperate between you, the pitied, who is 'under' me, and myself. What this constructs is a chasm between those that pity and those that are being pitied.
Heh. Never would it occur to the person who pities that perhaps - they may one day be the person at the receiving end. To them, pity would be something they would be all-too-willing to give, but all-too-unwilling to receive.
And I guess this is why pity doesn't constitute true love. LOVE is something you will be BOTH willing to give and receive. Why the golden rule - treat others as you would like to be treated yourself describes love so well. No one, in their right mind, would go 'looking for pity' - often, being pitied is a last resort which they must endure - because they know what those that pity you really feel - that they are above you, somehow more valuable as human beings than you.
To pity anyone is wrong.
To love them - horizontally - no power-relationships - this is true love. To embrace who you would otherwise 'pity' as fellow brothers-in-arms. To embrace them as being just like you. To acknowledge that you are no better than them - that you are just as frail and weak a human being as them, but that at the same time both you and them are strong, willed human beings too.
Only at such an equal-footing can true love be given and received. Only upon such an acknowledgement.
Always think of this especially when you try to love or care about someone who society otherwise labels as 'lowly' - because they are not, and with those 'vertical', 'power' spectacles you will never practise true love. When you see beggars, when you see criminals, when you see disaster-victims, when you see addicts, when you see disabled people, when you see orphans -
Know that really, you are no different to them, they are no different to you, and THIS is why we should care about them and love them. NOT because we are 'above' them in any way.
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Silence with grace
Let me reveal to you today a truth that those who medicalise, label and stigmatise silence never realise.
I have realised that there are two types of silence in this world: silence with awkwardness, and silence with grace.
We are all too familiar with the first type of silence.
But here’s a thought: Do awkward silences exist insofar as one decides to feel awkward in that moment of silence? And then that such perception perpetuates itself; one actually starts acting awkwardly, uncomfortably; the silence is unbearable and one wants to do something about it.
Yes, that is the only type of silence that this modern world seems willing to recognise.
Silence in itself is a lost virtue in today’s world.
*
I wish to suggest and live a second kind of silence -
Silence with grace.
What is this?
It is to embrace silence. To enjoy silence. To cherish it; to revel in it.
It is NOT treating silence as a source of awkwardness - no, no, no!
It is to live a graceful silence; where one has accepted one's silence and embraces it.
Accepting, enjoying tranquility.
A problem is only a problem insofar as one continues to perceive it as a problem. One's silence will cease to be a problem when one has accepted it, invited it to be a part of oneself.
And then, one will start to become a 'master of silence' - where one enacts silence to a degree that... it is no longer 'awkward' to them; it is natural, it is part of themselves, and hence one will be able to show what it means to be silent with grace.
This is a truth that those who stimagtise silence will never understand until they actually open their eyes and try to understand us as human beings, beautiful as who we are, individual as who we are.
I have realised that there are two types of silence in this world: silence with awkwardness, and silence with grace.
We are all too familiar with the first type of silence.
But here’s a thought: Do awkward silences exist insofar as one decides to feel awkward in that moment of silence? And then that such perception perpetuates itself; one actually starts acting awkwardly, uncomfortably; the silence is unbearable and one wants to do something about it.
Yes, that is the only type of silence that this modern world seems willing to recognise.
Silence in itself is a lost virtue in today’s world.
*
I wish to suggest and live a second kind of silence -
Silence with grace.
What is this?
It is to embrace silence. To enjoy silence. To cherish it; to revel in it.
It is NOT treating silence as a source of awkwardness - no, no, no!
It is to live a graceful silence; where one has accepted one's silence and embraces it.
Accepting, enjoying tranquility.
A problem is only a problem insofar as one continues to perceive it as a problem. One's silence will cease to be a problem when one has accepted it, invited it to be a part of oneself.
And then, one will start to become a 'master of silence' - where one enacts silence to a degree that... it is no longer 'awkward' to them; it is natural, it is part of themselves, and hence one will be able to show what it means to be silent with grace.
This is a truth that those who stimagtise silence will never understand until they actually open their eyes and try to understand us as human beings, beautiful as who we are, individual as who we are.
Friday, March 13, 2009
Impromptu speech, on-the-spot thinking, spontaneous creativity, ‘speaker’s block’.
It’s not that I cannot think; rather, it’s the fact that when I am put on the spot my thinking ceases to function.
Often, minutes later, when that spotlight has worn off of me, I can think of a million brilliant things that I could have said.
But… when that spotlight is on me to say something, I cannot think properly!
My mind erases into a blank white slate. I just don’t know what to say. Suddenly, I forget everything. I feel that I need to respond, to say something, but I cannot think of anything. All I see is this blank, whiteness.
Not to mention the incredibly short time ‘society’ allows for a response, before things start drifting off into ‘awkwardness’. It’s certainly in the sub-second range.
So, I guess, it’s wrong trying to think of what to say after someone has finished saying something; rather, you must be actively be constructing your response before the other person has said everything.
Perhaps that’s what I’ve been doing wrong. But then again, sometimes you’re told to speak on very short notice.
I call it an art, really, in such cases – where people begin their talking while they’re trying to think of what to say next. True multitasking. And not saying incoherent things either – all the while saying socially, situationally, grammatically appropriate and coherent things.
I call it spontaneous creativity.
I will even go far as to say this is the origin of human creativity. In my view, human creativity blossomed once language had been invented. Now, people had to be incredibly creative on very short notice to merely have a simply conversation.
I guess something is inhibiting my free-flow too much. The thoughts are there, but something is blocking it.
Often, minutes later, when that spotlight has worn off of me, I can think of a million brilliant things that I could have said.
But… when that spotlight is on me to say something, I cannot think properly!
My mind erases into a blank white slate. I just don’t know what to say. Suddenly, I forget everything. I feel that I need to respond, to say something, but I cannot think of anything. All I see is this blank, whiteness.
Not to mention the incredibly short time ‘society’ allows for a response, before things start drifting off into ‘awkwardness’. It’s certainly in the sub-second range.
So, I guess, it’s wrong trying to think of what to say after someone has finished saying something; rather, you must be actively be constructing your response before the other person has said everything.
Perhaps that’s what I’ve been doing wrong. But then again, sometimes you’re told to speak on very short notice.
I call it an art, really, in such cases – where people begin their talking while they’re trying to think of what to say next. True multitasking. And not saying incoherent things either – all the while saying socially, situationally, grammatically appropriate and coherent things.
I call it spontaneous creativity.
I will even go far as to say this is the origin of human creativity. In my view, human creativity blossomed once language had been invented. Now, people had to be incredibly creative on very short notice to merely have a simply conversation.
I guess something is inhibiting my free-flow too much. The thoughts are there, but something is blocking it.
Thursday, March 12, 2009
The Grand Paradox of Human Interaction
I don't know how people enjoy talking about, what to me are quite 'trivial' matters.
Let me list what to me are the list of boring, trivial topics people seem to enjoy talking about:
- asking 'how you are' 'how it's going'
- the weather - not just today, but how it has been / will be for the past month / year.
- how bored they are of working / doing something / being here.
- other people. (and what they think of them)
- past interactions with someone else. ("I was like ...." "He was like ...." etc.)
- The Weekend - what they did, plans for it.
- when the next break will be. What they want to eat or drink. Or, comments on what they did eat or drink in the last break.
- their / others' clothes.
- How they 'feel'. (No, not the 'grand' feelings such as intense sorrow / happiness.. just the mild, trivial 'feelings'.)
- latest TV show / music / movie.
- 'neighbourhood' or 'in-group' news / current events. (No, not 'world events')
- Their domestic life.
Yeah. To me they just seem like trivial topics 'not worth' talking about. I guess this is why I often can't think of what to say - I just don't value the above sort of things, whereas other people clearly do! Well, I'm fine with that. I don't want to have conversations about 'nothing'. Sure, they call it 'social lubrication' or whatever, but... I don't wanna do it - yes - even at the expense of social interaction, because... I don't want to be doing something I don't want to.
Why can't people talk about things more interesting!!!
Let me list what to me are the list of boring, trivial topics people seem to enjoy talking about:
- asking 'how you are' 'how it's going'
- the weather - not just today, but how it has been / will be for the past month / year.
- how bored they are of working / doing something / being here.
- other people. (and what they think of them)
- past interactions with someone else. ("I was like ...." "He was like ...." etc.)
- The Weekend - what they did, plans for it.
- when the next break will be. What they want to eat or drink. Or, comments on what they did eat or drink in the last break.
- their / others' clothes.
- How they 'feel'. (No, not the 'grand' feelings such as intense sorrow / happiness.. just the mild, trivial 'feelings'.)
- latest TV show / music / movie.
- 'neighbourhood' or 'in-group' news / current events. (No, not 'world events')
- Their domestic life.
Yeah. To me they just seem like trivial topics 'not worth' talking about. I guess this is why I often can't think of what to say - I just don't value the above sort of things, whereas other people clearly do! Well, I'm fine with that. I don't want to have conversations about 'nothing'. Sure, they call it 'social lubrication' or whatever, but... I don't wanna do it - yes - even at the expense of social interaction, because... I don't want to be doing something I don't want to.
Why can't people talk about things more interesting!!!
Wednesday, March 04, 2009
Companionship
I guess all I want in life is simple.
I just want some companionship.
Real companionship... someone whom I can share things with...
Someone whom to casually just talk to...
Someone to be just there for me.
They don't have to do anything, they don't have to say anything;
Just be there for me...
Not speaking a lot takes its toll after a while ... you just want someone to talk to.
I just want some companionship.
Real companionship... someone whom I can share things with...
Someone whom to casually just talk to...
Someone to be just there for me.
They don't have to do anything, they don't have to say anything;
Just be there for me...
Not speaking a lot takes its toll after a while ... you just want someone to talk to.
Tuesday, March 03, 2009
The power of labels
The human brain works in a funny way.
The moment we label something, we lose our ability to see much beyond that label.
For example – if you label oneself –
You may end up limiting yourself to that label, like a self-fulfilling prophecy.
*
Sometimes it’s best not to label at all.
Then they can be ‘free’.
*
Descriptions are tricky things.
By describing something, we are summarizing something, in some ways, reducing something to that description.
We must remember – descriptions often fail to capture everything; we lose / distort large amounts of ‘information’ as we try to ‘capture’ objects / phenomena of the world in words / other media.
This is why I think ‘theories’ differ from ‘reality’ – theories, by their very nature, simplify things down – intentionally or not – hence they fail to ‘encompass’ or ‘capture’ everything.
Also, in my view, we say a literature / work of art is ‘good’ when they in fact do manage to ‘capture’ surprisingly a lot - things that we often fail to capture in normal ‘descriptions’. To borrow Alexander Pope’s words, good writing / art expresses -
“What oft was thought, but ne'er so well expressed.”
In fact, this quote was said about wit. Indeed, sometimes humour ‘captures’ certain things unexpectedly well. (And perhaps part of why we find things 'funny')
Sometimes, narratives, or ‘personal stories’ may capture more than ‘hard, factual’, accounts.
Sometimes, not telling certain things – omitting certain things may tell more than including them. It may ‘capture’ the essence of something more than trying to brutally describe everything. There is a quote I remember from high school English class that I’ll never forget – “Always show, never tell.”
I always kind of wondered why there were so many different forms of writing / art. I'm slowly starting to understand - each form captures certain things other forms cannot. Sure, we can interpret from one form to another - as you would translate between languages. For example, one can 'describe' a poem using prose. But no matter what you do, it will fail to capture everything in that poem; to do that reliably... one will have to write the poem itself.
The moment we label something, we lose our ability to see much beyond that label.
For example – if you label oneself –
You may end up limiting yourself to that label, like a self-fulfilling prophecy.
*
Sometimes it’s best not to label at all.
Then they can be ‘free’.
*
Descriptions are tricky things.
By describing something, we are summarizing something, in some ways, reducing something to that description.
We must remember – descriptions often fail to capture everything; we lose / distort large amounts of ‘information’ as we try to ‘capture’ objects / phenomena of the world in words / other media.
This is why I think ‘theories’ differ from ‘reality’ – theories, by their very nature, simplify things down – intentionally or not – hence they fail to ‘encompass’ or ‘capture’ everything.
Also, in my view, we say a literature / work of art is ‘good’ when they in fact do manage to ‘capture’ surprisingly a lot - things that we often fail to capture in normal ‘descriptions’. To borrow Alexander Pope’s words, good writing / art expresses -
“What oft was thought, but ne'er so well expressed.”
In fact, this quote was said about wit. Indeed, sometimes humour ‘captures’ certain things unexpectedly well. (And perhaps part of why we find things 'funny')
Sometimes, narratives, or ‘personal stories’ may capture more than ‘hard, factual’, accounts.
Sometimes, not telling certain things – omitting certain things may tell more than including them. It may ‘capture’ the essence of something more than trying to brutally describe everything. There is a quote I remember from high school English class that I’ll never forget – “Always show, never tell.”
I always kind of wondered why there were so many different forms of writing / art. I'm slowly starting to understand - each form captures certain things other forms cannot. Sure, we can interpret from one form to another - as you would translate between languages. For example, one can 'describe' a poem using prose. But no matter what you do, it will fail to capture everything in that poem; to do that reliably... one will have to write the poem itself.
Doctors vs. Scientists
Today... we had an interesting discussion.
It was to differentiate between medical doctors and scientists.
And... in a group of medical students, it's not hard to get some prejudiced images of scientists, and some ideal images of doctors.
The group 'consensus' was that doctors had to deal with 'more' than scientists - that not only do doctors need to know the science, they need to know people too. And they also said that a doctor's job is more 'complex' because not only do they have to deal with swathes of facts, but swathes of 'emotions' too.
They somehow painted the picture that scientists were these unemotional, passive beings who sat in dim-lit labs over petri dishes, 'not caring'; to them patients were just labels, not 'real people'. Scientists had no social / communication skills. They were detached from the 'real world'.
Well.
My heart couldn't disagree more.
Really. Scientists - especially those in life sciences - are very concerned about people. Let me just put it this way - their passions are directed... in a slightly different manner to doctors. They are trained in... different... skills and roles. But to question their emotions and intentions, is wrong.
The people that will be finding the cure for cancer will be scientists. The people that will be finding a cure for heart disease will be scientists. Patients will thank the doctor that delivers these treatments, but we know, that really at the back there were some great, dedicated scientists out there - who directed their passions and acumen to a noble and worthy goal.
Yeah. I am a scientist at heart... I know it...
It was to differentiate between medical doctors and scientists.
And... in a group of medical students, it's not hard to get some prejudiced images of scientists, and some ideal images of doctors.
The group 'consensus' was that doctors had to deal with 'more' than scientists - that not only do doctors need to know the science, they need to know people too. And they also said that a doctor's job is more 'complex' because not only do they have to deal with swathes of facts, but swathes of 'emotions' too.
They somehow painted the picture that scientists were these unemotional, passive beings who sat in dim-lit labs over petri dishes, 'not caring'; to them patients were just labels, not 'real people'. Scientists had no social / communication skills. They were detached from the 'real world'.
Well.
My heart couldn't disagree more.
Really. Scientists - especially those in life sciences - are very concerned about people. Let me just put it this way - their passions are directed... in a slightly different manner to doctors. They are trained in... different... skills and roles. But to question their emotions and intentions, is wrong.
The people that will be finding the cure for cancer will be scientists. The people that will be finding a cure for heart disease will be scientists. Patients will thank the doctor that delivers these treatments, but we know, that really at the back there were some great, dedicated scientists out there - who directed their passions and acumen to a noble and worthy goal.
Yeah. I am a scientist at heart... I know it...
The lengths one will go to not break someone's heart.
Tomorrow was supposed to be D-day.
Tomorrow was supposed to be the day I would break someone's heart.
I had been tossing and turning the past few days because of this.
My mind has been very heavy.
I didn't know what to do.
You see, no one in their 'right mind' breaks someone's heart for no reason. Usually there is a moral dilemma associated with it. Usually, there is an other side to the equation.
In my case, it was myself. The troubles my heart would go through. The fears, the worries, the anxieties, the awkwardness.
Yet here I am. I called it off. I will not break their heart. No - no, no ... it is such a cruel thing to do. You would never do that to a person ...
Instead... I'd rather suffer myself. I'd rather take it on myself. I'd rather live through the pain head-on. I'd rather walk on the burning path. I will take all the shame, I will take all the embarrassment, I will live through the awkwardness, I will be that sore thumb, I will be that piece that doesn't fit in, I will be that loner;
But no, I will not break someone else's heart. Not after what they have done for me. I would rather suffer myself.
Tomorrow was supposed to be the day I would break someone's heart.
I had been tossing and turning the past few days because of this.
My mind has been very heavy.
I didn't know what to do.
You see, no one in their 'right mind' breaks someone's heart for no reason. Usually there is a moral dilemma associated with it. Usually, there is an other side to the equation.
In my case, it was myself. The troubles my heart would go through. The fears, the worries, the anxieties, the awkwardness.
Yet here I am. I called it off. I will not break their heart. No - no, no ... it is such a cruel thing to do. You would never do that to a person ...
Instead... I'd rather suffer myself. I'd rather take it on myself. I'd rather live through the pain head-on. I'd rather walk on the burning path. I will take all the shame, I will take all the embarrassment, I will live through the awkwardness, I will be that sore thumb, I will be that piece that doesn't fit in, I will be that loner;
But no, I will not break someone else's heart. Not after what they have done for me. I would rather suffer myself.
Thursday, February 26, 2009
Stand in the rain
She never slows down.
She doesn't know why
but she knows that when she's all alone,
feels like its all coming down
She won't turn around
The shadows are long and she fears
if she cries that first tear,
the tears will not stop raining down
So stand in the rain
Stand your ground
Stand up when it's all crashing down
You stand through the pain
You won't drown
And one day, whats lost can be found
You stand in the rain
She won't make a sound
Alone in this fight with herself
and the fears whispering
if she stands she'll fall down
She wants to be found
The only way out
is through everything she's running from
wants to give up and lie down.
So stand in the rain
Stand your ground
Stand up when it's all crashing down
You stand through the pain
You won't drown
And one day, whats lost can be found
You stand in the rain
So stand in the rain
Stand your ground
Stand up when it's all crashing down
Stand through the pain
You won't drown
And one day, whats lost can be found
So stand in the rain
Stand your ground
Stand up when it's all crashing down
You stand through the pain
You won't drown
And one day, whats lost can be found
You stand in the rain
-Superchick
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
The Profound Art of Thinking of What to Say
I guess it all has to do with experience -
That is, to know what to say, and what to do, in a social situation.
A lot of people have a variety of social experiences to draw their social repertoire from. Also from very early on in their life (almost from their birth), they have had the chance to observe and model / copy others in how to behave socially (and the social 'encouragement' to do so). I guess this is also the way in which 'culture' in general is passed on, rather 'effortlessly' and 'naturally', between generations.
In my view the following is how people 'think of what to say' in a social situation: They make extremely fast, 'calculations' if one may put it, in their subconscious of what to say. That is, what is appropriate to say, given the setting, the other person(s), the relationship, the context. This is done very fast with minimal 'conscious' thinking involved. Given the above variables, one's mindset, one's grasp of language, and in some respects, one's intention... words come out conjured and weaved together effortlessly and naturally. Language truly is a wondrous thing indeed, and a very intrinsic human faculty.
Like everything else in life, the degree of such 'automation' I guess corresponds to the degree of skill and experience. When we first learn to do a new activity - be it learning to bike, to swim, to play tennis, whatever - we initially have to think very consciously about every little movement we make, every little thing to do, what to do next, whether we did it correctly... and so on. But as we learn, certain things are 'grasped', and are relegated to automation. My guess is social skills and "knowing what to say" work much the same way.
Oh yes, and how could I forget creativity. To 'think of what to say' in the very short time we have in a conversation (down there in the millisecond range), we must have very good creativity. Sure, previous experience helps us immensely in preparing us with certain stereotyped responses, (and more generally in the 'ways' to respond / say things) but that cannot discount the huge role of creativity.
To 'conjure up', out of... 'nothing', something that is relevant, appropriate and 'interesting' - how can things get more creative than that? Yet this is what one must do in any conversation. To have a mind that can search through the recesses of one's memory and experience extremely quickly, and synthesise the right thing to say - in milliseconds. I mean, it pretty much has to be 'automatic'. And yes, I daresay, like riding a bike, reading a book - this is indeed a skill. One has to be creative to have a conversation.
And yes... this all reminds me of how human intelligence, and language for that matter, evolved in the first place: For social purposes. For as you can see, language and creativity are absolutely integral in developing human social relations, with all its complexity.
No. Sadly, human intelligence didn't evolve to make us better tool-users and wield technology. These were merely 'side-effects'. Nor was it evolved for 'academic' learning. This was a side-effect too. It evolved to... so-called 'enrich' our social interactions. Just as the peacock gradually evolved its marvellous tail to 'look nice' to females, humans gradually evolved 'intelligence' to embellish and decorate their social interactions; including language and creativity. Of course, it has had immense side-effects; but alas, to this day, such things remain as side-effects to the grand social theme.
That is, to know what to say, and what to do, in a social situation.
A lot of people have a variety of social experiences to draw their social repertoire from. Also from very early on in their life (almost from their birth), they have had the chance to observe and model / copy others in how to behave socially (and the social 'encouragement' to do so). I guess this is also the way in which 'culture' in general is passed on, rather 'effortlessly' and 'naturally', between generations.
In my view the following is how people 'think of what to say' in a social situation: They make extremely fast, 'calculations' if one may put it, in their subconscious of what to say. That is, what is appropriate to say, given the setting, the other person(s), the relationship, the context. This is done very fast with minimal 'conscious' thinking involved. Given the above variables, one's mindset, one's grasp of language, and in some respects, one's intention... words come out conjured and weaved together effortlessly and naturally. Language truly is a wondrous thing indeed, and a very intrinsic human faculty.
Like everything else in life, the degree of such 'automation' I guess corresponds to the degree of skill and experience. When we first learn to do a new activity - be it learning to bike, to swim, to play tennis, whatever - we initially have to think very consciously about every little movement we make, every little thing to do, what to do next, whether we did it correctly... and so on. But as we learn, certain things are 'grasped', and are relegated to automation. My guess is social skills and "knowing what to say" work much the same way.
Oh yes, and how could I forget creativity. To 'think of what to say' in the very short time we have in a conversation (down there in the millisecond range), we must have very good creativity. Sure, previous experience helps us immensely in preparing us with certain stereotyped responses, (and more generally in the 'ways' to respond / say things) but that cannot discount the huge role of creativity.
To 'conjure up', out of... 'nothing', something that is relevant, appropriate and 'interesting' - how can things get more creative than that? Yet this is what one must do in any conversation. To have a mind that can search through the recesses of one's memory and experience extremely quickly, and synthesise the right thing to say - in milliseconds. I mean, it pretty much has to be 'automatic'. And yes, I daresay, like riding a bike, reading a book - this is indeed a skill. One has to be creative to have a conversation.
And yes... this all reminds me of how human intelligence, and language for that matter, evolved in the first place: For social purposes. For as you can see, language and creativity are absolutely integral in developing human social relations, with all its complexity.
No. Sadly, human intelligence didn't evolve to make us better tool-users and wield technology. These were merely 'side-effects'. Nor was it evolved for 'academic' learning. This was a side-effect too. It evolved to... so-called 'enrich' our social interactions. Just as the peacock gradually evolved its marvellous tail to 'look nice' to females, humans gradually evolved 'intelligence' to embellish and decorate their social interactions; including language and creativity. Of course, it has had immense side-effects; but alas, to this day, such things remain as side-effects to the grand social theme.
Friday, February 20, 2009
I'D RATHER BE ANTISOCIAL.
I always wondered what MADE people antisocial.
I know now.
It's that very society.
Really - society doesn't present itself as worthy of my attention any more.
I can't believe I've been trying so hard to become social in a society that doesn't deserve it.
What a waste of time.
I'm just gonna be myself and walk my solitary road. I DON'T CARE ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE.
I've lost faith in humanity.
They're boring. They're dumb. They're stupid.
They conform so much. It's all their wee wee story.
If you weren't there from the beginning IT IS ALL !@$!$! IRRELEVANT TO YOU.
I just don't care any more.
I really, really don't.
Conform or get lost.
Be normal or get lost.
...
FINE I WILL GET LOST. YOU GET OUT OF MY SIGHT TOO.
I hate society. From the depths of my heart. I hate people. I really, really, really, do. They're just trivial, meaningless, pointless creatures that don't deserve anything. I sincerely hate humanity.
I hate them. I hate them all. They just are not worthy of my attention. good-bye. Irrelevancies.
Really. I can't be bothered trying any more. It's pointless. I'm just gonna be my "antisocial" self.
There is no point trying. It's a goal certainly not worthy of pursuing. Society is just pointless.
I know now.
It's that very society.
Really - society doesn't present itself as worthy of my attention any more.
I can't believe I've been trying so hard to become social in a society that doesn't deserve it.
What a waste of time.
I'm just gonna be myself and walk my solitary road. I DON'T CARE ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE.
I've lost faith in humanity.
They're boring. They're dumb. They're stupid.
They conform so much. It's all their wee wee story.
If you weren't there from the beginning IT IS ALL !@$!$! IRRELEVANT TO YOU.
I just don't care any more.
I really, really don't.
Conform or get lost.
Be normal or get lost.
...
FINE I WILL GET LOST. YOU GET OUT OF MY SIGHT TOO.
I hate society. From the depths of my heart. I hate people. I really, really, really, do. They're just trivial, meaningless, pointless creatures that don't deserve anything. I sincerely hate humanity.
I hate them. I hate them all. They just are not worthy of my attention. good-bye. Irrelevancies.
Really. I can't be bothered trying any more. It's pointless. I'm just gonna be my "antisocial" self.
There is no point trying. It's a goal certainly not worthy of pursuing. Society is just pointless.
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Always be yourself
Always be yourself
Because the people who mind don't matter
And the people that matter, don't mind.
I bet no one understands me.
I know
That it is really hard,
really, really, hard
For socially well-adjusted people
To understand someone like me.
They just don't know what to do with someone like me.
I am just too weird.
Just too different.
They pity me
Like an object
And move on.
I am not a person
To whom
one can have a chat with
A simple conversation
About
The going ons in one's life.
I am ... just not that sort of guy
They deal with me "officially"...
then move on.
You cannot
Have
personal
relations with me
Something
Is deeply wrong with me.
That it is really hard,
really, really, hard
For socially well-adjusted people
To understand someone like me.
They just don't know what to do with someone like me.
I am just too weird.
Just too different.
They pity me
Like an object
And move on.
I am not a person
To whom
one can have a chat with
A simple conversation
About
The going ons in one's life.
I am ... just not that sort of guy
They deal with me "officially"...
then move on.
You cannot
Have
personal
relations with me
Something
Is deeply wrong with me.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Pokemon theme music - surprisingly inspirational
It's been over 10 years since I first heard the Pokemon theme music.
Yet, I have only recently realised that the lyrics are surprisingly inspirational and very motivational. Perhaps this is why it became so popular in the first place - it really gives people, including children, courage, confidence and the meaning of friendship.
Even as 'adults', if you take all the Pokemon references metaphorically, or allegorically, where "Pokemon" symbolises something, or someone important, valuable in your life - then bam, here's an amazing, inspirational song for you - brutally frank and sincere unlike many songs out there.
I wanna be the very best
Like no one ever was
To catch them is my real test
To train them is my cause
I will travel across the land
Searching far and wide
Teach Pokemon to understand
The power that's inside
Pokemon!Gotta catch 'em all--
It's you and me
I know it's my destiny
Pokemon!
Ooooh, you're my best friend
In a world we must defend
Pokemon!Gotta catch 'em all--
Our hearts so true
Our courage will pull us through
You teach me and I'll teach you
Pokemon!Gotta catch 'em all!
Gotta catch 'em all!
Yeeaa.
Every challenge along the way
With courage I can face
I will battle everyday
To claim my rightful place
Come with me the time is right
There's no better team
Arm in arm we'll win the fight
It's always been our dream
Pokemon!Gotta catch 'em all--
It's you and me
I know it's my destiny
Pokemon!
Ooooh, you're my best friend
In a world we must defend
Pokemon!Gotta catch 'em all--
Our hearts so true
Our courage will pull us through
You teach me and I'll teach you
Pokemon!Gotta catch 'em all!
Gotta catch 'em all!
Gotta catch 'em all!
Gotta catch 'em all!
Gotta catch 'em all!
Yeeeaa!
Yet, I have only recently realised that the lyrics are surprisingly inspirational and very motivational. Perhaps this is why it became so popular in the first place - it really gives people, including children, courage, confidence and the meaning of friendship.
Even as 'adults', if you take all the Pokemon references metaphorically, or allegorically, where "Pokemon" symbolises something, or someone important, valuable in your life - then bam, here's an amazing, inspirational song for you - brutally frank and sincere unlike many songs out there.
I wanna be the very best
Like no one ever was
To catch them is my real test
To train them is my cause
I will travel across the land
Searching far and wide
Teach Pokemon to understand
The power that's inside
Pokemon!Gotta catch 'em all--
It's you and me
I know it's my destiny
Pokemon!
Ooooh, you're my best friend
In a world we must defend
Pokemon!Gotta catch 'em all--
Our hearts so true
Our courage will pull us through
You teach me and I'll teach you
Pokemon!Gotta catch 'em all!
Gotta catch 'em all!
Yeeaa.
Every challenge along the way
With courage I can face
I will battle everyday
To claim my rightful place
Come with me the time is right
There's no better team
Arm in arm we'll win the fight
It's always been our dream
Pokemon!Gotta catch 'em all--
It's you and me
I know it's my destiny
Pokemon!
Ooooh, you're my best friend
In a world we must defend
Pokemon!Gotta catch 'em all--
Our hearts so true
Our courage will pull us through
You teach me and I'll teach you
Pokemon!Gotta catch 'em all!
Gotta catch 'em all!
Gotta catch 'em all!
Gotta catch 'em all!
Gotta catch 'em all!
Yeeeaa!
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